The iLLest

Haven’t blogged in a long time.. So here goes I think. Last year I almost sold the one thing I could ever dream of, but I would’ve made the biggest mistake of my life if I had gone through with it.
This year, I have and will make it work.. No matter how much I question and doubt myself.. I am very blessed to have what I have, and do what I do for a job.

Been in Singapore the last few weeks, and hearing how people can pick and chose what jobs they want.. N jobs like working at macdonalds is considered a low class job..I don’t know what I’m tryna get at here. Maybe to actually appreciate what you have. Been scheming up a whole lot of ideas for the re launch.. Good time to set great foundations. I have learnt so much from doing my management modules through the company I work for. I mean, they can be the most frustrating company to work for at times, but in a way.. They can be the best company I could ever work for.

I was very Priviledge to get promoted to become a 2ic at one of the stores in Auckland after only being in the company for a year. And yes I pushed really hard for it. with all the experience I had working in all the other stores..I hadn’t realized what kinda asset I was to the company. Our bosses always tell us how good we do.. Blah blah.. But often, we only remember the negative stuff they have imprinted on us through whatever situation. And sad to say, often that is how we view the company.. Eg poor management etc. But then, me being in a management role..managing my team, can lessen the stress levels of my bosses…and if every team member worked well together.. The better we will do. I guess what I’m saying is that..why keep dwelling on the cons of what the company should be doing for you..but focus on the pros of what you can do for the company? Then it brings it back to.. When our bosses leave a negative impression on us.. That’s what we take on about the company.. So.. Wouldn’t our bosses be the same? If I left a negative imprint .. Wouldn’t my boss think negatively bout me? and of course I wouldn’t be going anywhere! but lucky for me,my bosses are pretty aight :) so yes, it works both ways! And I learnt the hard way.

Managing a team and training and getting them to work the way you want to..the clockwork sequence is no joke! Yeah Whoohoo I’m a 2ic.. But fact of the matter is.. I work for my staff before they work for me. I have grown to love my staff.. All 5 of them with all different personalities.. The conflict they have, who works well together.. How to piece them all together to make the A team! I dont have a big store.. But what I have is really great staff with great aura.. And we striven teamwork. I’ve worked in many stores with many different teams.. There is one team that I look up to.. Set my standards to what that team has taught me and showed me and higher. I’ve been apart of that team.. And here i am managing a team that can lift the standards of what teamwork can do!:) and I appreciate the customer service that this company has instilled in us!:)

I can’t wait to get back to my team!!

Sooo..thought I’d blog after awhile.. It’s been awhile. At the moment I’m sprawled across 4 chairs at the dance studio blogging. Was surfing my past posts and man I almost cried! It definitely has been awhile.

Today, sitting in the studio which has been a big part of my life in the past 3 months.. I ponder about the past 8 months I’ve been in Auckland. I only planned to be in Auckland for 6 months. I am somewhat homesick reminiscing about the times at Hume st with the Hume st fams.. When they took me n Jayde in when we lost our homes in the febuary Chch earthquake and put a roof over our heads the instant they found out we had no home. Man this makes me wanna cry already. The amount of support n love they have showed me.. Through the crazy toughest times.. Pillow talks with Justin about God and relationships.. N the heartbreak he’s seen me go thru.. N the many times that he would tell me he will never let me go back to that. The many memories of great laughs n Cole’s funniest remarks. .. Hanging through earthquakes n looking at each other everytime an aftershock happens to see who will dash to the door first..or justin checking on me in the middle of the night to see wherther i felt an aftershock. Haha. Man.. The washing machine that never wanted to do our laundry n beeped every 5 minutes. Jayde n I always cooking for the family of 12 though there’s only 6 in the house. That house pretty much is jersey shore with everything that goes on. I miss Hume st!! N they aren’t here for my birthday!:( I think they have seen so much of me more then most people. I really do treasure that friendship n they have my love n support no matter what. I miss Hume!! ahh…tearing up already. Madd fun times.. And now Permy is Welly..Im in Akl..but its one of those things that you know will never go away?? I miss the Footlocker crew at 94404 and 94408..nothing can really replace that..

Auckland has been crazy. Like I said in previous posts, it’s a hectic lifestyle up here. N alot to deal with when I first arrived. But whatever doesn’t kill u only makes u stronger. Different culture…people..opportunities. But still different from family, and your friends that are pretty much family.  I’m now an assistant manager.. N it’s one of the most pressurizing job most times. Been through some crazy tough times. Sitting in the studio listening to a track from the movie burlesque.. I am reminded of what makes me happy no matter what. Something that I look forward to everytime there’s an opportunity.. Dance. It’s my life. Through everything that happens.. I’m still dancing. No matter how big or small the stage is.. No matter how big or small the audience is.

So many times I question why i decided to just up and leave and come to a place where i know that i will have to face front on some of the toughest things in my life.. Do life without family. Leaving them in a city that isnt that safe…its just alot to take in..what a crazy person i am. hahahahaha…

Dilemmas of love and lost… Haha.. Oh well. It is what it is. Alot presented to me n infront of me.. Cheers to that. Haha.. Dance time.:)